July 11, 2011

These people make me wish that I was a dancer

The Nederlands Dans Theatre is an amazing contemporary ballet company- I had the privilege of meeting Stefan ┼╗eromski, NDT's ballet master on Saturday morning when he taught a master class at the Singapore Dance Theatre and I've never felt so bitter about not having the chance to have done ballet as a child ): ): He taught them Whereabouts Unknown, which was really beautiful even in its rough, unfinished form, and I later found out that NDT had performed this at Cal in March earlier this year

!!!! Cry of anger. I have dutifully stalked the Cal Performances' website and have already marked out all the performances I want to go for (Cal students get 50% off and I haven't watched a single show in my 2 years at Cal- I am really ashamed).

But anyway, he was the sweetest man and so very talented; here's the Youtube video of the second piece, Sehnsucht, by Lightfoot and Leon. It absolutely caught my heart- the piece in full is STUNNING. When the guy left the room through the door, I almost cried.

Something that I've realized is that I haven't watched as many shows as I'd like to since leaving for Berkeley- I've always thought that I would rather spend my money on clothes or food rather than on performances, and that is sadly the prevailing mindset of most Singaporeans. If anything, the one major thing I'm taking away from my internship is that I need to go back and start attending theatre and music performances more regularly because [and this may sound a little melodramatic] a small part of me wasn't really living when I concentrated more on the management rather than the art of the arts.

One thing that Paul Lightfoot said in the post-performance talk was that beauty "is not in the things that you do well but in what you can't do"; that Sehnsucht was an untranslatable German word that meant nostalgia, yearning, the memory of loss and what you cannot get back- this is how I feel sometimes, when I think about singing again. I don't think I will do much of it ever again, but the memory of it haunts me occasionally, like when I stand on the Esplanade concert hall stage (for other things, now) and remember singing my memories of practice and yes, tears and exhaustion and frustration, to the audience; like throwing your heart out and losing it somewhere within slivers of chords.

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